What Drug Matches Each Sign

Potheads, wannabe potheads, and weed enthusiasts around the world celebrate April 20 as pretty much a national holiday. The exact origins of 4/20 remain unclear, although numerous conspiracy theories have been circulating for years. In honor of National Weed Day or whatever you like to call it (#bestdayever), we decided to match up each sign to its proper drug or "drug". Happy holidaze.

Aries: Endorphins

While endorphins aren't technically a drug, they produce euphoric sensations and have similar effects on the brain as most other hard drugs. Endorphins usually come from some exercise or physical exertion, which makes sense for Aries because they're always on the move.

Taurus: Weed

Weed, like Taurus, is a classic. Taureans love surrounding themselves with stability and good times, and they're also super connected to the earth. Taurus loves simplicity, and weed is just about as simple but classic as it gets.

Gemini: Magic Mushrooms

Mushrooms can be a great time if you're sure you're in a good set and setting. Mushrooms can have two effects though, just like good ole Gemini. While some trips on mushrooms can be pleasant and psychedelic, other mushrooms can actually be poisonous. So, like Gemini, you might never know what you're gonna get.

Cancer: Salvia

Salvia is a plant that be grown anywhere—even your backyard. That sounds pretty fantastic to Cancer, doesn't it? Michael Phelps (a Cancer!) was photographed smoking Salvia a few years back. Salvia is classified in the same category as weed, but it's also versatile, like Cancer, and can be either chewed or smoked.

Leo: Tequila

So let's remember from 5th grade DARE  that alcohol is a drug! Tequila is a very in-your-face alcohol, just like lovely Leo. Tequila is very much so about quality, because everyone knows that the low-quality type will burn way too much. That's why we always want that top shelf brand Tequila, exactly like Leo.

Virgo: Peyote

Peyote, like Ayahuasca, causes deep personal insight and philosophy. Virgo and Peyote go together because Peyote is used also as a pain reliever, and Virgo is always looking to both awaken their soul and help soothe others.

Libra: Ayahuasca

Ayahuasca is a traditional and spiritual drug used primarily by indigenous Peruvians. Many users have spiritual revelations, and Ayahuasca must be done with a Shaman present. Ayahuasca focuses on becoming the best person you can, which aligns pretty much with Libra's point of view and life philosophy.

Scorpio: Ecstasy

Cause this shit's intense.

Sagittarius: LSD

Sagittarius and LSD are connected because LSD deeply connects you to your thoughts. LSD allows you to reach into the depths of your soul and mind, just like any good conversation with a Sag.

Capricorn: Adderall 

Capricorns and Adderall walk hand-in-hand because Adderall makes you focus, and Capricorns need to always be doing work.

Aquarius: Opium

Aquarius is opium because the drug comes from a beautiful flower, the poppy. Opium is a pain-reliever and was loved the world round for hundreds of years. Hell, a war was even fought over it. Aquarians are known for being a calming presence and beautiful souls.

Pisces: Love

Their love and your love is their drug. End of story.

From The Vault: The O.C.

From The Vault is a series in which we analyze classic TV & Film characters to determine their matching astrological sign.

When discussing the early aughts, it’s impossible (and shameful) to miss a chance on speaking about The O.C. The teen television drama, which ran from 2003-2007, was seminal in paving a way for teenage soap opera mega-hits like Gossip Girl, Pretty Little Liars and more. Hot teens, trust funds and minimal parental supervision make addictive television and there’s no going around it.

RYAN ATWOOD: ARIES

Ryan Atwood is the Chino transplant in Newport Beach, a brooding boy from the wrong side of the tracks. It’s cute watching Ryan experience the spoils of wealth for the first time. He’s like those YouTube videos of babies trying candy for the first time, often in awe of the life Seth has known his entire life and has come to resent. Ryan represents the baby of the zodiac, Aries the ram. On one hand they’re full of life and on the other they are major hotheads. Ryan essentially spends season one punching at least one person per episode. Get this hothead back into the pool house!

MARISSA COOPER: TAURUS

As the princess of Newport Beach, Marissa is the Taurean representative of her proverbial seaside kingdom. Taurus is ruled by Venus, which means that luxury is a huge element of who Marissa is as a person. She takes a Chanel quilted bag to school everyday and has no concept of money, if anyone needs refreshing on this aspect. She also has the darker side of Taurus, which manifests in her inability to handle high-stress situations without having a meltdown. Got a problem? Drink it away! Pressing internal struggle? Steal your best-friend’s step-mom’s painkillers and go on a bender! 

SETH COHEN: AQUARIUS

Seth Cohen is a freak. But he’s also incredibly smart, kind and a much needed source of comic relief when the drama in Newport Beach reaches critical levels of crazy. He’s the epitome of the air sign Aquarius; often lost in his own world of comics and fantasy but ready to drop everything to be there for his loved ones. 

SUMMER ROBERTS: SCORPIO

Summer Roberts is Marissa’s ride-or-die girl. She knows how to get what she wants and you’re out of your mind if you think you can stop her. But beneath her intense exterior, she’s incredibly sensitive and loving. The duality of insanity and compassion means that this Newport Beach resident is none other than the water sign Scorpio. Don’t cross her. 

SANDY COHEN: LIBRA

We would be remiss if we neglected to analyze Sandy Cohen’s astrological potential. Sandy is Seth’s dad and literally the only functioning adult on this show. Everyone else is either drunk, conniving, absent, committing fraud or a combination of the four. Sandy is incredibly just (he’s a lawyer, after all) and provides a much needed balance to the chaos that often plagues the wealthy residents of Orange County. Sandy is without a doubt a Libra—he and his eyebrows strive for equality and Newport Beach is lucky to have him. 

Amanda Bynes Through the Ages

On Sunday, April 3, Amanda Bynes celebrated her 30th birthday. She rang in her birthday celebrations at none other than Six Flags. That's a typical Aries move—celebrating your special day filled with adrenaline, friends, and most likely a lot of food. 

Amanda Bynes has been a comedic force since her early days in All That, and we saw her pull a complete 180 with her numerous Twitter tirades. Although some conspiracy theorists say her identity change was all a publicity stunt, maybe her lifetime of fame all came crashing down at one moment. Nonetheless, we've been with Amanda from Totally Kyle to Hairspray.

She was one of the best actresses on All That

Then The Amanda Show with those flawless dancing lobsters

She and Frankie Muniz TOOK DOWN Paul Giamatti in Big Fat Liar

Remember the time Colin Firth was her British dad who was literally almost about to become Prime Minister? 

There was also the time Amanda Bynes changed comedies and Shakespeare adaptations forever with She's The Man and starred one of the most quotable movies of all time.

She showed off her singing talents in Hairspray, but her role in Easy A was just as epic.

Then this happened

But we're so happy to hear she's doing great at FIDM! Happy Aries season to one of the most epic and dynamic Aries out there.

Pisces Spring Guide

1. DREAM INTERPRETATION GUIDE

No sign dreams quite like Pisces dreams. And in the process of chasing one dream, Pisces dreams another little dream and derails further into different uncharted territory. Dreams are tricky things, and romantic PIsces gets drawn into their allure easily. With the freshness of spring comes the desire to do something *new*, start something different, and what better place to look for clues as to what that "something" is than last night's unconscious adventure?

2. COACHELLA TICKETS

Coachella is PIsces' second home. The first is Burning Man. Naturally. You love nothing more than tripping in the desert with 1000 of your new best friends/potential threesome partners while music pulsates through your veins and you're wondering whether Tupac's hologram is actually just a ghost. You'd hate to miss those desert sunsets, which fill your watery Pisces eyes with fresh tears, but there's really no excuse for missing LCD Soundsystem play. It's like...your heart is calling to you. Your drug dealer is calling to you. You saw a talking magic mushroom in your dream and can feel festival season calling to you. And there's no turning your back on festival season.

3. ECSTASY

As if you'd see LCD Soundsystem sober.

4. FLORAL HEADDRESS

Springtime gatherings in the outdoors, whether it's a festival or a Taurus picnic or a hike, are ideal for ethereal Pisces. You have an otherworldly quality about you, and the spring gives you the opportunity to romp around and truly be the majestic creature you are. Take out your floral crown, because spring is your kingdom. The kingdom of dancing in the grass without your shoes on. The kingdom of "I just really want to touch you because I'm on MDMA." The kingdom of watching the clouds change shape. Do you, Pisces. Because we need your amazing visionary dreams for the world to keep spinning.

5. PISCES PIN

Two little fishies, sitting on a pin. K-I-S-S-I-N-G.

Aquarius Spring Guide

1. Wacky Bicycle 

Aquarians are known for their unique style, out-of-this-world sensibilities, and incredible inventiveness. It should be no surprise, then, that wacky bicycles are the must have item of the season. Wacky bicycles come in all shapes and sizes (oversized front wheels, extra tall handle bars, etc), but no matter which impractical style you choose, this spring essential will complete any "I told you it's just as fast as a car" look.

2. Bernie for President

This spring, make sure you call up all the super delegates and let them know that that there's only one candidate who deserves their vote. Try accessorizing your tireless phone calls by placing bumper stickers on every hard surface within reach, and if you're feeling really sassy, tattooing Bernie's glasses onto your body. So cute!

3. Remotes

Aquarians are extremely tech-savvy, and love trying new digital devices. Unfortunately, however, it's not uncommon for Aquarians to misplace the remotes. This season, don't lose the remotes! And, if you do, check under the couch cushions. Effortlessly chic.

4. Soapbox

These air signs are the humanitarians of the zodiac, and are deeply concerned with social and political issues. Every sensible Aquarian knows that a soapbox is a spring essential for unofficial public speaking and unwelcome lectures. Modeled after the classic soapboxes of the 19th and early 20th centuries, this four-cornered object screams "free speech." Remind your friends and family that they are selfish, bourgeois pigs by using your soapbox all season long! 

5. Aquarius Pin

You hate being told what to do, so we'll make this brief. Align x DEERDANA pins are available now.

Capricorn Spring Guide

1. GMAT Study Guide

Spring's hottest Capricorn essential is the sleek, sexy GMAT study guide. It's understated, yet mysterious. It's puzzling, but provides infinite food for thought. It goes with any outfit, but looks especially chic at your local independent coffee roaster. It's personal, yet relatable. A huge improvement from 2015's outdated guide, the GMAT 2016 guide is going to sell out real quick, so you better get your hands on one soon.

2. Handcuffs

Spoiler alert: straight laced worker bee Capricorn is really something else in bed. They're not afraid to get freaky, and with springtime sexy vibes floating around, they can't help but bust out the cuffs. But only once they've finished their work for the day.

3. Practical sandal

You like fun, Capricorn. You really do. You like it as your gift to yourself after all the long hours you've spent slaving away at work. Give yourself a nice treat - a hike or a camping trip. And if anyone recognizes how prepared for fun one has to be, it's you Capricorn. No, fun isn't just a spontaneous thing. It's planned. You can't just have fun, as though it's not something you earned or that you were given. Your practical sandals for spring adventuring tell the story of a cautiously prepared fun-haver. Let the adventures begin! 

4. Baseball Cap

It's baseball season! You're a classic person with respect for America's classic sport: baseball. And when you celebrate baseball, you do it with respect for tradition. Have you caught yourself humming the seventh inning stretch song or placing Amazon Now orders for cracker jacks? Probably. Because that's what real, committed baseball fans are like. On another note, caps are practical and keep the sun out of your face. You can't show up to a meeting with a big ol sunburn.

5. Capricorn pin

Some people put pins on their caps right? That's CRAZY, man. Too crazy. For you, Capricorn, a lapel is just fine.